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The main reason I like Tokyo so much is that the city is a million different things to a million different people. No matter what facet of Japanese life and culture you're looking for, whether the bizarre or the traditional, the modern or the old, it's almost certain you'll find it - and more - in the metropolis.
And if it so happens that you're interested in sampling Japan's popular culture: anime, dancing, robots, neon lights and music, then nothing - and I mean absolutely nothing - in the entire city is better than Shinjuku's Robot Restaurant.
Located smack in the middle of the nightlife, entertainment (and red light) district of Shinjuku, within short walking range of the train station, the Robot Restaurant isn't so much a restaurant as it is a modern cabaret show, created specifically to meet every single stereotype that gaijins (foreigners) have of modern Japan.
Map and Street View photos courtesy of Google
There are four shows a day (about 1-and-a-half hours long), and ticket prices range from ¥5,950-¥7,000/pax depending on which website you buy from. Ticket in hand, head around the corner to the entrance, take a lift up a few floors, and marvel at the amount of bling, shine, lights and music. There's no rhyme or reason here; the designers made it so unbelievably gaudy because they could.
Once the show's about to start, head down the stairs to the stage (or perhaps 'arena' would be a more accurate word): a strip of floor flanked on both sides by seating, tables, and floor-to-ceiling LCD TV panels. The tables are, of course, for food & drinks - ¥500 buys you a beer and ¥1,000 one of a few choices of bento boxes of the night.
We've put together a short, 2-minute teaser video of what the experience looks and feels like. And yes, the thumbnail on the video is totally a costumed woman riding a dinosaur.
The awesomeness begins. The first mini-act opens up with a bit of tradition: A dozen or more performers in a combined drum-and-dance routine, accompanied by (naturally) lights, animated images on the LCD panels and a J-Pop soundtrack. It's loud, it's catchy, it's energetic, and fun as hell to watch. What we loved most was the sheer energy, smiles and joy coming from the performers, despite our show being the 4th one of the evening.
A short intermission (and opportunity to restock on beer) is followed by a hilarious story of good and evil: A village of forest dwellers where humans live in harmony with nature is invaded by evil, robot-wielding monster things. And so the forest fights back ...
... with what can only be described as kung fu panda riding a huge cow. So awesome!
Po gets his ass kicked, though, so we move on to a back-and-forth duel that mimics (or makes fun of) every single shounen manga ('young boys manga') in existence. i.e., Team A wins a fight. Team B powers up and wins. Team A powers up again and wins. Team B powers up yet again, repeat til infinity.
Revealing every single character would spoil the fun, but there are spiders, and gorillas. And dinosaurs. And miniguns and robots with lasers. There's absolutely no logic here but I absolutely love it!
Yet another intermission (and opportunity to visit the washroom to get rid of all that beer), with a natural progression to ... a musical marching band performance ...
... followed by a short led-and-lasers dance performance while staff hand out blinking wands to the crowd ...
... before the grand finale where some girls with the Superman logo on their chests, together with some others in robot costumes, wave, dance, and jump around in a performance so unlike anything I've ever seen before that I don't even know how to describe it in words.
Did I also mention some of them sit on female-shaped robots and drive around the arena?
If there ever was a real life situation to use the "what is this I don't even" meme, this would be it. There's no logic to any of the acts, the backstories are the cheesiest in the history of live shows, and there's no continuity in between. None of this is authentic Japan: It's as if the designers took a list of 'top foreigners stereotypes of what they think Japan is,' and just shoehorned everything to fit. But I don't care, and I totally love it. It makes no sense and yet it's the most awesome thing I've ever seen in my three visits to the city.
If you had only one night in Tokyo, and you could only see do one thing, you must visit the Robot Restaurant. It's THAT good.
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